Rev. Ben Fowler
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A Clean Palate

7/16/2011

5 Comments

 
I have a goal for the summer: to clear my head of the constant chatter and relax. I spend a lot of time with things like meditation and chanting; wonderful past-times that allow me some quality connection with my spirit. Wonderful as they are, however, they are also focused on mindfulness. What I really have need of is mindlessness. 

I have said this before: it can become quite a burden to try to live in a constant state of mind that requires awareness. It is, in some ways, like seeing life through a camera lens--never quite experiencing being in the present because my awareness lies on trying to be aware of my experience rather than to just be in my experience. (A bit convoluted, I know, but, well, what can I say?)

So I have been trying to just do things this summer. I have been fixing some nagging problems in the deck of my boat. Grinding, sanding, fiber glassing, sanding, filling, painting. Yesterday I cleaned and waxed the entire hull of the boat. And I have been mowing the lawn, recording some music, carving and sanding a walking stick, working on the occasional house project. Tomorrow, I go sailing with some friends for a few days, then come home to get my own boat in the  water. 

I can't say yet that the weight of my journey has been lifted from my shoulders.  It does still feel like my struggles linger on in the background most of the time. I manage to make it a burden that is tough to shuck. But I am relearning the value of doing things that require no thought, or creative thought only. 

I am remembering that there is being built into doing, perhaps more being in doing than in trying to figure out just how to be. It is just one more of those things that requires balance. 
5 Comments
ben white
7/15/2011 10:02:03 pm

i can relate to the doing, etc. i am working on a wood sculpture for the first time in many years. thanks for the thoughts, ben. ben

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Peggy Tucker
7/16/2011 09:09:53 am

Ben, I can also relate to the doing.. building the stone wall at the church has been a labor of love.. while I have been working I am not thinking of much else besides the rocks and how they fit together or how the "gardens" work into the hill. I have never whittled but it must be similar looking at a piece of wood and creating it into a walking stick or a sculpture..creating a heightened awareness of the natural world around us through physical contact with it. Have a great time sailing with your friends. Peg

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Lisa B
7/23/2011 11:59:10 am

Ben - woo hoo! This is brilliant and a huge relief for the doer in me who has been tryign so hard not to do but just to be. I have been doing some side work to make a little money while I am takinga break from my "life work". Painting interiors of houses with one friend, and packing mapled nuts for another friend.
I am doing, having a sense of accomplishment, and it requires absolutely no deep thought, a complete rest for the brain. It has been very nourishing actually and your post made me understand - it is not about NOT doing, but about presence and being in the doing. Brilliant. Thank you.

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http://www.bondage-society.com/us/california-dominatrix/bdsm-corona.shtml link
10/10/2013 12:58:16 am

Was just taking a break and wanted to post here

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Corona BDSM link
10/14/2013 03:06:45 am

I stumbled on this from Google and wanted to say thanks for posting

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    Rev. Ben

    I am an Interfaith Minister. My ramblings are primarily  random thoughts, and commentary on life, love and the pursuit of happiness. See more on the ABOUT ME page (above).

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