Rev. Ben Fowler
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Truth or Consequences

10/15/2012

6 Comments

 
Recently the concept of truth seems to be on my mind. You might think it is a result of the political climate these days, but actually my thinking was spawned by the comments of a friend about her state of mind. In essence, she was commenting on how she was going around talking about how stressed she was, and that she had decided to change that by going around saying how happy and centered she was. That got me thinking; is the “truth” what we are, or is it what we say we are?

One of the things I learned from my depression this summer is that it is nothing to be ashamed of. I also learned that no amount of thinking will make it go away. I can set it aside for a while and ignore its effect on me now and again. Yet this happens mostly by my accepting that it is a part of my life right now and by my living with it rather than trying to change it. If I try to change it, I expend considerable energy trying to be something that I am not. That energy might well be better used elsewhere. Like being who I am.

At the same time, by trying to change it, I am not being honest with myself or with others about how I am actually feeling. This is where the truth question comes in. If I am trying to change myself by pretending that I feel some way other than I actually feel, what is the truth? If I tell others that I am happy (when I am not) the truth to them is that I am happy—they know no different. But just by saying this, does it change the truth to me?

Now, there is plenty of evidence that we can change the way we feel by thinking differently. But is that necessary? Can we also change the way we feel by thinking honestly? By fully accepting my depression, and by being open with others about it, I find it not all that difficult to live with. No, I have not grown to love it, but it sits alongside me, and only has a middlin' effect on my ability to live my life in a reasonably normal manner.

My kind of depression is, of course, a physical malady more than a state of mind. But stress and anxiety of any kind are expressed through our body in one way or another. Just as ignoring the signs of a cold coming on will sure lead to a full blown cold, ignoring stress by trying to talk or think our way out of it, without taking action to change those things that are triggering it, certainly increases the possibility that we will deepen our malaise.

Ramana Maharshi, one of the great Hindu sages said: “Your duty is to be; and not to be this or that.” What this means to me is that we are not put on this earth to just be happy, or in love with life, or just be depressed and embittered by our lot. We are also not put here to always be up and positive, or always down and disheartened.

Rather, we are put here to be whole; to be truthful with ourselves (and others) about who we are and to love ourselves in spite of how we might rather be. 


6 Comments
Natty link
10/14/2012 11:52:45 pm

Nice Benny! Thanks for this! Love you, Natty
PS Island closed, hauling BAHATI Thurs!

Reply
Lisa Buell
10/15/2012 12:49:22 am

Ben-ananda,

Thanks for this. I have a friend suffering from, and resisting, depression that I will share this with. Lots of love

Reply
Katie Moody
10/15/2012 08:59:16 am

Well said Ben, I wholeheartedly agree. And you witnessed my journey of being real and open with my grief and stress for a couple of years! Ugh! Time for lunch soon. Peace

Reply
Nancy Willett
10/15/2012 11:20:34 am

Recently I was told that if one spends three minutes, three times a day naming what we are grateful for that sometimes depression is lifted.
I do believe myself that there is little more powerful than gratitude.
At the same time, after long years trying to overcome my clinical depression through talk therapy, it was not until I finally gave in and agreed to try the medication recommended. What a difference. I found therapy supportive and stress reducing and I am grateful for it. However, I do believe unrelenting depression is a physical brain disorder and I am only sorry I resisted mediation for about ten years. My own life as well as the lives of family members would have been less painful if I had not been afraid of it. I've learned a great deal and I am a teacher for NAMI working with family members. The doctors, nurses and social workers write the curriculum. I simply present it.
It is absolutely life changing for family members.
Enough! I will now get off my soap box.
Love and blessings, Ben. Nancy

Reply
Phin
10/18/2012 08:30:08 am

The truth? The truth is boring and unimaginative.It is weak withn the bounds of the necessary constraint. A lie on the otherhand is exciting, feathered and rich, brilliant with out limitations and can go where ever the imaginatioin can stretch it. It has unlimited colors and textures; plays on any preconceptions and is not bound in any way to reality. For this reason they are powerful, successful weapons and usher people using them to the dark side. Lies are designed to entice believers into a fantasy world where they are asked to make decisions which in the absence of the lie they would never choose..Believers are in the fantasy all by themselves because the liar knows the situation and can't share or enter into the the fantasy.The liar spins a web for his own gain. When lying works it is so easy that the path of truth and honor looks dry and much too hard an effort.
.
As dour an uninteresting the truth may be, the honor in and search for the truth is everything, Good news and bad news grounded in reality; there is no other way to make the best possible decisions.

So the truth is everything even if it is painful because it leads to appropriate analysis and the best possible decision. and eventually a good result. Untruth is hideously dangerous, hard to spot and in time has no good end.

Reply
Susan Stibler link
12/9/2012 11:58:27 am

Thanks for being you!
Let me know if we are going to chant again?
Love Susan

Reply



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    Rev. Ben

    I am an Interfaith Minister. My ramblings are primarily  random thoughts, and commentary on life, love and the pursuit of happiness. See more on the ABOUT ME page (above).

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